I want you to think for a moment. Where are you happy. Truly happy? No complications, just pure enjoyment, relaxation and peace of mind.
My short trip to the Smoky Mountains last weekend reminded me of how much I enjoy getting out into the wilderness.
what a view!
Around my hometown, there are parks and places to go hikes.... but even in the deepest part of that wood you can hear the cars and airplanes go by.
In the mountains, it was total tranquility and peace. Just sitting on the side of a path, and enjoying the gentle sounds of the forest in a light rain.
That is my happy place. I'm at total peace.
Now I understand not everyone loves the outdoors like I do. I have a friend who we be terrified to be out in the woods like I was. She even faked being sick as a child to get out of camping.
So, my challenge to you dear reader is: Think.
Dig deep inside, and find where are you at peace. Total peace. Where nothing else matters, and all troubles disappear even for just a moment? Is it a church? A museum? Maybe your backyard garden. Still enjoying nature, but of a more domestic sort.
Distractions are everywhere.
This is a busy electronic world filled with distractions at every corner.
Commercials scream at you while you're driving down the road listening to the radio.
Your smart phone demands your attention with various apps and games that you have to visit frequently.
Even Facebook emails you relentlessly when you don't check in. (I found this out during my Facebook free February.)
So how do you avoid distractions?
Try to eliminate them before they get a chance to steal too much of your time.
Leo Babauta had a wonderful thought on procrastination on his site Zen Habits. "embrace your procrastination as a friend, enjoy it … and then ask the friend to leave for awhile so you can get your work done. No friend should monopolize all your time."
Distractions and procrastination are the same thing.
If you are truly drawn to that game on your phone.... take a 5 minute break and indulge. Then get back to work. Or better yet, set the temptation in another room. So it takes physical effort to be distracted by it. You are less likely to be distracted if you have to get up to walk into another room, rather than have it next to you within reach. Multi-Tasking is really distracting. People used to think multi-tasking was a plus on a resume. Something all employers were looking for. In all actuality though, we don't multi-task, we distract-a-task. We move from task to task, one at a time, being distracted by the next thing you have to do. Leaving the prior task incomplete, or just good enough. We really should just be focusing on one thing at a time to be the most efficient. Studies have been done on this and multi-tasking is now being given the bad name it deserves. So in my next interview, if they ask me if I multi-task, I'll say "No, I prefer to give my full attention to the task at hand rather than being distracted by lesser priorities." Turn off your cell phone. Unless you have someone you take care of and you need your cell phone on to receive emergency calls, you may want to turn it off. It seems that whenever I sit down to work, I get phone calls trying distract me. They aren't urgent, just friends checking in, but never the less it is a distraction. We've become so dependent on cell phones in the past 14 years. I say 14 years, because while cell phones existed when I was in college, we didn't carry them. When looking around at new technology or distractions, I like to think.... What did we use before these things were invented? Before cell phones? You waited until you were home from your destination to take calls (even just as far back as answering machines..... remember those?) Ahhhh simpler times. :)
As with anything, do what you can, when you can. Little by little, step by step you'll make your way down the path you've chosen.
Cats have got it right. Lounge all day, eat, soak in the sun, and find a warm lap to snuggle with. I say this as I shove my cat off my lap and laptop so I can type.
Sitting still, though, is a good practice to adopt.
But I sit all day in an office you say? That's not the same.
Try sitting in one spot and be totally still, still of body and still of mind. It's REALLY hard!
I've played with trying to meditate on and off for a couple years, but the last 2 months I've really tried. By tried, I mean I've remembered to try a couple times a week rather than a couple times a month.
So HOW do you do it? You ask?
Well, I can only tell you how I've started.
My mind goes crazy fast. I can be having a conversation with one person and 5 -10 other random thoughts are just jumping out all over the place. In fact, while I sit here writing this, I have 3 more other ideas to write about that just popped in. So keep an eye out for those :)
Whenever I tried to meditate, I couldn't stop my mind. I tried thinking of a blank piece of paper, that didn't work. More ideas just came through.
Follow me to Sesame Street
During meditation its ok if your mind wanders, acknowledge it and then let it go and calm the mind again.
But sometimes that's difficult as well. So what I started to do was count. I would count backwards from 99, visualizing the numbers in my head like you would see them on Sesame Street. (And yes, I did just link to Sesame Street :) ) Big, Bulky, Cartoony Numbers
That really helps, and its easier to visualize a number to get back on track when your mind starts to wander.
I set little goals for myself, like trying to see if I could get to 50 before having a stray thought.
When I first started I could only get to every 5 numbers before being interrupted. But as I practiced more and more it got longer and longer between interruptions. Practice makes Perfect :)
I'm almost able to get to 50 now without any interruptions.
Well, without interruptions from my mind, I still get interrupted by my cat wanting to sit on my lap.
Monte - My Big Distraction - I should rename him.
As my practicing with counting continues, I find myself stopping counting and just sitting. Quietly.
Calm mind. Yes, really, me with a calm mind.
It seems that once your brain is told that you really want to calm it down, it gets the hint and calms down.
But if a thought intrudes, I start to count again until all is quiet.
So if you're wanting to give meditation a whirl, but can't seem to quiet your mind, try counting.
Why Meditate?
Why torture yourself by sitting still? With today's rush rush world, its like hitting the reset button.
I've found I'm much more positive and overall happy and calm from meditation. And that's saying alot.
Being a single mom can be very stressful. There are lunches to pack, endless laundry to be washed, worrying about your kid's safety. So anything I can do to bring down that stress is a win -win.
Remember: If it can be done in 5 minutes, DO IT! You can afford 5 minutes at some point and just sit.
Even if you're at work, try it on your lunch break. Close your office door and sit, or go outside if its nice and just sit. (And Count if you still haven't gotten the hang of emptying your mind)
I was recently let go from work. And while that is a normally VERY stressful time, I feel somewhat calm. I've been meditating and focusing on breathing. I feel that everything is going to be OK.
Positive thinking really goes a long way.
BREATHE!
Anytime you feel stress, take a moment and take a few slow, deep, breaths.
It makes you pause, slow down, and feeds oxygen to your brain. Win-Win!
Here's a nice book on how to get started with meditation.
I really enjoy reading Thich Nhat Hanh's books on mindful meditation, it really makes meditation seem easy.
on how to get started with meditation.